Feelings can suffocate you. Like many another person, I have had occasions when I have felt like one huge raw hurt and don’t know how to deal with myself or relate to others while I’m in that state. Recently, my granddaughter said something that helped to tame some monster emotion I was feeling. She said, “I’m mad and I’m sad.”
It took a four-year old to verbalize the grief and helplessness we were all feeling at that time because someone we loved had reached the end stage of cancer and we knew she would be with us only a few days more.
Many times in my life I have been mad and sad without being able to put my nebulous feelings into words. Years ago I coined another phrase which will help you understand what it means to me to succinctly label that frustrating feeling when things are all wrong and I can do nothing: “A problem defined is a problem half solved.” Bearing this in mind, whenever in the future I realize that I am mad and sad, I can remind myself that being mad won’t help and the sadness will eventually lessen.
Then, even though I may remain mad and sad, I will have that small ray of light we call “hope”. I will hope for a better future even as I accept that I’m mad and sad and can’t do anything about it. Labeled, categorized and with their limitation delineated, my overwhelming feelings will be easier to bear.