Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

All I Need to Know about Life I Learned from a Snowman

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It’s okay if you’re a little bottom heavy.

Hold your ground, even when the heat is on.

Wearing white is always appropriate.

Winter is the best of the four seasons.

It takes a few extra rolls to make a good midsection.

There’s nothing better than a foul weather friend.

The key to life is

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In the Beginning….

In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And Satan said, “It doesn’t get any better than this.” And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. And God said, “Let the earth

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How can you tell a redneck Church?

You Know Your Church Is A Redneck Church if… the finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one.

You Know Your Church Is A Redneck Church if… people ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two

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Humor Can Save Your Life

The story goes that a certain court jester went too far one day and insulted his king. The king became so infuriated he sentenced the jester to be executed. His court prayed upon the king to have mercy for this man who had served him well for so many years. After a time, the

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How Did We Survive

Looking back, it’s hard to believe that we have lived as long as we have.

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat. Our houses and baby cribs were covered with

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How To Help Women As They Grow Older

(Just for a good Laugh)

It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell. Let me relate how I handled the situation.

When

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How the Internet Began

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com.

She said unto Abraham,

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Fun Historical Facts

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May and still smelled pretty good by

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Getting Older

Getting Older my foot….perpetually aging sounds better

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.

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The Senility Prayer

Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

 
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